going crazy
2005-10-29, 9:01 a.m.

k, officially going nuts. So I have seen the man every night for the last three days, and he gets better and better...except for the teensy weense little fact that his interest is focused on the perfect girl up in Birmingham. I really need to stop seeing him, because I am liable to fall...very deep for this man. He is way more open than I thought he was, he has the same standards as I do, and I don't think he has bug eyes any more. :) I think he has very nice eyes. Last night I went to see the Homecoming concert being put on with Better Than Ezra and Collective Soul playing. I couldn't find the rest of the group, and this guy called me, and so we met up. He had a friend with him, this really awesome guy who needs to join the Church. :) Anyways, we had a really great time. Except for the fact that both of the leaders of the bands used cuss words to try and get roused up and were semi-crude. Anyways, his friend left and I ended up giving him a ride back to the Church, and guess who he talked with on the phone for a minute and talked about afterwards? Yep, you guessed it. !!!!!!!AHHH!!!!!!! I mean, I am fine with him talking with me about it...I guess...but at the same time...I don't know. But really, he is so easy to talk with and I enjoy being with him and...he's dating someone else. I had to keep reminding myself that last night cause I kept flirting with him (YES, I was flirting, and those of you who know me well know that that is no small feat for me). My hands were freezing and 3 times he briefly put them into his and I couldn't breath when he did. I was glad it was dark so that he couldn't get a good read on my expression. AHHHH!!!!

I think he started feeling like he couldn't or shouldn't talk with me about this girl, but the thing is that he is also becoming a good friend and I don't want him to feel like he can't talk with me about stuff. He was concerned about his relationship and divulged that info to me last night on the trip back to the Church which is where his car was parked and he TM'd me after he had a chance to talk with her and said that everything is fixed between him and her. Yeah, maybe a little too much info, but I was fine with him telling me that. But I don't know how my emotions are going to last for the next while.

This isn't going to be easy.

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